The Worm Has Turned

I am suddenly, terribly overwhelmed with baby cravings. Feeling tiny little hands on my face and getting slobbery baby kisses and having that warm little bundle sleeping in your arms. Maniacal baby laughter over peek-a-boo. Watching them learn...getting to see the click, the light, when they learn a new thing. Today I have remembered so clearly my own children's baby days, a bolt from the blue and I miss it and I want it again so, so much.

No, I haven't forgotten the poop, the vomit (sometimes directly ON you, twice in my face), teething, tantrums, nasty greasy dirty hair (that was THIS MORNING), lost sleep, lost body shape, lost sanity, and the COST. The cost is the biggest reality...bringer on (yeah that makes sense). So I won't be having a baby anytime soon. Ever really. Because once my sons are 18 and over I get to do things for me, me, me. Art school, move downtown maybe, midnight matinees, weird artsy friends, try to live like a bohemian basically. Ya know...all the stuff you're supposed to do when you're in your twenties, when you ought to be relatively unattached and have greater freedom. Dragon Baby turned twelve last week, twelve! Just six more years and I get to be 20 again. Except without all the alcohol, because now it just makes me sleepy.

I'm watching Spiderman 2. This one always makes me cry.

I want some chocolate chip cookies. Or some pumpkin cheesecake. Yes...pumpkin cheesecake from the coffee shop at Barnes and Noble. That is...da bomb.

The Halloween store closed November 10 and I've sent my resume out all over the place for a new job. I had an interview today, for a receptionist position. Actually it was with a temp agency trying to fill the receptionist position. I certainly have more confidence in this agency then the one I registered with last week. The other one just told me to fill out forms, took them and said, "we'll call you." Today's agency took all my info and then did a pre-interview, gave me all of their info in a new register packet and said they have two clerical positions in mind right away, told me I could do refresher training in the office if I needed to...I just felt a lot more comfortable with them. She said she'd call me by Wednesday.

I interviewed with a dollar store last week, and though that interview went very well and I think I had a good rapport with the manager for some reason I just don't think I'll get that one. Honestly if I can get a clerical position I'd much prefer it.

I think the Lamictal is working.

0 fans wrote in

{{-Learn from the Past ~ Look into the Future-}}

Did you miss a missive?
Well, now you've done it. - May 29, 2008
Oh, the hypocrisy! - May 26, 2008
Stupid Girl...Wednesday is Garbage day - May 21, 2008
this is what happens from too much loud rock and roll - May 20, 2008
nuthin but a number - May 19, 2008